A SON asked his father, “Dad, can you help me understand about politics?”
Dad explains:
“That is a little complicated, but let me bring it to an example that you can relate. Let’s use our home for example. I bring in the money, so I am the capitalist. Your mom manages the money so she is the government. I and mom take care of your needs, so you are the people. Our maid is the working class and your baby brother is the future. Now you understand?”
“That’s a little complicated, am not sure if I understand it right. Let me think about this,” the son replied.
Son sleeps and midnight came, he was disturbed by the crying of his baby brother.
He got up to check on his brother and saw he had soiled diapers. He went to his parents’ room and saw his mom fast asleep.
Father was not there, looked for him, and saw him in the maid’s room pumping the maid vigorously that they did not hear the baby crying nor his knocks on the door.
Son went back to bed.
The following morning, during breakfast, son tells the father,
“Dad, I think I know now what politics is”
“Good. Please explain it to me in your own words,” father said.
“After last night, I sense that while capitalism is screwing the working class, the people are completely ignored by the government and the future is full of shit,” the son said.
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Distance learning is really a big challenge to both students and teachers. Now, include the parents.
“Juan I suspect your mom helped you with your modules last night,” teacher says.
Juan:
“No ma’am. She did all of it.”
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Honest Juan yells out to his teacher:
“Miss, I need to piss”.
“Juan, that’s not proper word to use if you want to visit the John. The correct word is “urinate,” teacher tells Juan, adding, “Now, Juan use “urinate” in a sentence.
Juan thinking fast, said:
“You’re an eight. But if you had bigger tits you’d be ten.”
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A reporter from a news outfit got rejected on her request to get accredited by Malacañang media bureau to cover Spokesman Harry Roque’s briefing, called Malacañang asking:
“can I talk to the Spox?’
She got this reply:
“Mr. Roque resigned”.
Reporter called Malacañang front desk several times and always got the same answer that Roque resigned.
On his tenth call, she was asked:
“Why do you keep on calling?”
Reporter:
“I love to hear that answer”.
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A friend asked if I received that standard survey on FB on presidential preferences.
I said:
“None, I have not got one and same is true with most of my friends. Those surveys are table surveys, they never go outside the four walls of BBM headquarters”.
“This one is very interesting. You choose an icon identified with a presidential candidate, like Knockout punch for Manny Pacquiao. Pink wilting roses for Leni Robredo. Guns for Ping Lacson. China flag for Bong Go,” he said.
“Bongbong Marcos not in that survey?” I asked.
“No, he was. He had dollar bills with a foot note: check this and send your bank details to earn US$10.00.