In the news, Duterte orders return of donated Sinopharm vaccines. Now the country is waiting for the President to order the Chinese ships at the West Phil Sea to return to China.
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In the news, experts say the Philippines is losing billions of pesos a day to the Chinese invaders due to fishing and damage to our sea bed.
Our government is saying not to worry. China is a friend. And friends don’t steal from friends. They just sweet talk you to parting with your wealth.
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A mayor had lately been observed to be out of line, his temper getting the better of him in many media appearances. Reporters are asking, what is happening. Why the short fuse?
His exhaustion is suspect to come from his extracurricular activities. Knowing his problem he went to see his doctor.
Doctor: How often do you have sex?
Mayor: Four times a week. On Sunday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday.
Doctor: Cut out the Sunday nights. Mayor: Not likely doc. That’s the day for my wife.
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An applicant was asked in a job interview. “Can you take one hundred words a minute?” Applicant: “Yes sir! I am married to a politician.”
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In another room in same office, a young woman filling up her application form answered the question on sex: “twice a week.”
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The reported decline in corona virus cases in the NCR Plus area will lead to relaxed quarantine classification.
Health authorities expect NCR Plus to be under more relaxed quarantine class, allowing more economic activities to open.
My kapitbahay is hoping, the bars are allowed to open.
Asked why? He says “my doctor suggested that when I suspect Covid-19 hits me, I take a bottle of whiskey.”
Asked again if whiskey can cure Covid-19, he answered. “Of course it won’t cure Covid-19. But it surely will get the virus too drunk and won’t find its way to become a pneumonia.”
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The coronavirus has really hit close to home that several of my neighbors got sick, two in serious condition and were in hospital.
One of the two, a clerk in a non-revenue government office, got cured fast and released by the hospital in three days.
My other kapitbahay, a manager in a bank, got released after over two weeks.
I asked my wealthy kapitbahay why he stayed much longer in the hospital. His answer: “When you’re poor, the hospital cures you fast.”
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Here’s the answer to last week’s riddle:
What’s the similarity of banks and sex? Answer: After withdrawal, interest is lost.