Is Xian Lim Suffering From 'Jilted Lover Syndrome'?
Equal Space

Is Xian Lim Suffering From 'Jilted Lover Syndrome'?

Jun 21, 2024, 7:18 AM
Luchie Aclan Arguelles

Luchie Aclan Arguelles


Hogging the headlines and social media is the separation of partners for more than a decade Kim Chiu and Xian Lim and Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla.

I am particularly intrigued by the after-separation behavior of Xian who stood pat on claims that it was Kim who initiated their breakup last December. So, Xian was dumped!

While we are aware that he was hell-bent on promoting his flopped movie "Playtime" by appearing in talk shows, getting interviewed in online programs, and continuously banking on his breakup with Kim to make a dent. All these gave the impression of hard-sell strategies to gain leverage, mileage and sympathy.

Their first roadshow for the movie held at the Event Place of a mall in Malabon was dismal. There were more monoblocs than fans. With all the seemingly overwhelming effort to attract compassion of "the one left behind," these boomeranged!

Kim, on one hand, simply refused to elaborate or hint on anything related to the breakup "out of respect" to the other party.

Ominous Vengeance

With all the perorations and direct hit on Kim, the image Xian projected was that of a jilted lover who could not get over the separation. His posts and words in interviews are brooding of ominous vengeance and unkind thoughts, specially so that Kim has Paulo Avelino, an onscreen partner, aside from her booming career and aggregate endorsements.

Xian has proudly brandished he has a new girl friend in the person of a co-worker named Iris Lee who, he claimed, was not the third party in his separation with Kim.

We are not judging Xian. We can only speculate and tender our opinion based on what we have read and heard directly from the horse's mouth.

Rejection Sensitivity

At first, the picture of hatred was how all his social media posts and words appeared and sounded. Reading between the lines and hearing how he talked, his is undeniably the behavior of one still hurting.

Why will a gentleman, with a new girlfriend, keep mentioning his past relationship and the circumstance of the parting of ways. Hasn't he gotten over it after six months?

On such demeanor, Dr. Milu Maria Anto, a clinical psychologist, qualified this similar to the "jilted lover syndrome". This syndrome is related to crimes of passion but isn't piercing words just as hurtful?

"A person very low in rejection sensitivity is disturbed ... (that) such individuals feel insecure if they feel (sic) that their partner is independent ..."

"Jilted" is synonymous to being abandoned, broken off with, or ditched.

Scary Change

An unwelcome change — such as the sudden parting of ways, whether planned or unplanned, after more than a decade of relationship — causes significant stress that could lead into such syndrome, manifesting in many ways.

Change could be discomfitting and scary.

Kim projects a picture of happiness and contentment with all her current accomplishments, and living her life of singlehood with ease and grace.

She has many suitors and project offers fill her cup to the brim. Kim's teleseryes hit the viewers mark with gusto and her hosting and out-of-town shows are always a hit.

For the jilted ex-partner, all these could be very annoying.


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