I have no qualms disclosing that my life journey has strayed into many roller-coaster rides of ‘ups and downs’, most of which wound down to flamed-out plans, short-lived successes, disastrous choices, shattered dreams, vanished hopes, crushing defeats, painful failures, broken relationships, enervating disappointments and frustrations, and agonizing despair – such that, at times, I would find myself precariously teetering on the edge of ending my life. These soul-wrenching experiences prompted me to scour for answers, for meaning – and in such ‘bottom-stuck’ moments, I always tried to cleave to the following bottom-line truths.
1. Nothing is permanent and there is no such thing as ‘bottomless’ or ‘bottom-most’.
Remember this: No matter how miserable or fateful your situation, it is not permanent; it will pass. Life changes every second, and so you can too. You can’t be stuck in a situation forever.
More often than not, without realizing, we feel we want to give up at the very point when we are so close to a breakthrough. Keep going at all costs. The only time you can fail is when you give up. The moment you can’t is the moment you stop being able to.
There is no such thing as “end of the rope”. Or “bottom-most” or “bottomless”. As long as you are alive, anything is possible (not excluding miracles). As long as you are alive, you are free to keep on trying. That is your choice. That is your call. As has been said, try and try again, until you succeed.
2. Struggles and pain are opportunities for growth.
Life is not an “all-comfort zone”. Imperfect as life is, it is riddled with discomforts, disappointments and all kinds of dissonances. Pain and struggles are part and parcel of life, but they are not stumbling blocks; they help us grow. They are, in fact, a step forward towards learning and transformation.
Remember, the safest path is not always the most convenient or the best. The more the challenges, the more you learn, and the more opportunities for you to grow.
Sometimes we are so obsessed with what we want to get from our toils or exploits, such that we often forget that the best thing we can gain from every challenge and struggle is not the thing we want, but the “person” we become in the process.
3. Worrying can’t change anything. Be positive and live in the present.
If there is anything that kills more people faster than any dreaded pestilence, it is worrying. You can’t change anything by worrying. Negative thoughts inevitably engender negative results. But positive thoughts create positive realities. You may not be capable of changing what is actually happening to you, but you can choose how to react from within to what is happening – by being positive.
You don’t have to cry over a failed or unhappy past, it’s gone. And neither should you stress yourself about the future, it hasn’t arrived yet. What you can do is live in the present and make it beautiful. The past can’t be altered, yes. But we can, at present, choose and act what we desire for the future.
4. Always PRAY and have an “attitude of gratitude”.
Prayer is the best antidote to any problem. Not only in rock bottom moments should we pray, but in both good and bad times, at all times.
Soren Kierkegaard, Danish philosopher, once said, “The function of prayer is not only to influence God, but also to change the nature of the one who prays.” Prayer therefore is not only aimed at getting what we are praying for. By itself, it is a profound experience of transcendence or the divine, providing us a host of benefits: it calms the spirit and brings peace, joy, gratefulness and relief.
And, as has been oft said, the highest form of prayer is giving thanks. So, always be grateful for what you have. Count your blessings.
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