How To Deal With Envy
Candid Conversations

How To Deal With Envy

Sep 15, 2023, 7:32 AM
Vivien Mangalindan

Vivien Mangalindan



Envy can make us feel unhappy. It's when we look at what someone else has - and wish we had it too. Well, these feelings can happen to the best of us.

Let’s talk about why we feel envious - and how we can turn it into something positive.

Definition of Terms

Envy (from Google)

- a feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else's possessions, qualities or luck

- a desire to have a quality, possession or other desirable attribute belonging to someone else


Here are some reasons behind the emotion of envy.

  • Social Comparison. Imagine: you see your friend get a new cell phone. Suddenly, you wish you had one too. That's envy in action. We like to compare ourselves to others. And when we think they have something that we want - it can make us feel envious.
  • Insecurity Matters. People who don't feel confident about themselves feel envious more often. If we don’t feel great about who we are - it's easier to get upset when we see others doing well.


Dealing with envy isn't always easy. But with a few simple steps - you can turn this challenging emotion into an opportunity for growth.

Step 1 - Admit It

If you're feeling resentful of someone’s new cellphone - admit it to yourself. Say: "I'm feeling envious." Recognizing the emotion is the first step.

Step 2 - Understand Why

Try to figure out why you're feeling this way. Is it because you really wanted that thing? Understanding helps a lot.

Step 3 - Use It Positively

Envy can be like rocket fuel. Use that energy to make yourself better. If your friend received a higher sales commission, maybe it's time for you to work harder.


The next time envy strikes, don't be discouraged. Instead, channel that energy.

  • Set new goals
  • Work harder
  • Improve yourself

This change in mindset can empower you to achieve personal growth.

Remember: Begin your journey to a more fulfilling life. Start today.


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