Have you ever experienced “bottom-stuck” moments – when everything simply seemed to have gone wrong? Or being pinned down by tragedies or misfortunes, hopelessness and depression, pain and struggles?
No doubt, the present wrenching, if not debilitating, quagmire of COVID-19 has caused us much pain, anxiety, fear, and lingering suffering.
But, aside from COVID-19, how do we deal with life’s tr4agedies and pains? Here are some bottom-line truths to remember as insightful provenances of inspiration – and while we navigate the long dark tunnel of COVID-19.
1. Nothing is permanent and there is no such thing as ‘bottomless’ or ‘bottom-most’.
Remember this: No matter how miserable or hateful your situation, it is not permanent; it will pass. Life changes every second, and so can you. You can’t be stuck in a situation forever.
More often than not, without realizing it, we feel we want to give up at the very point when we are so close to a breakthrough. Keep going at all costs. The only time you can fail is when you give up. The moment you decide you can’t is the moment you stop being able to.
Now, is there such a thing as the “end of the rope”? Or “bottom-most” or “bottomless”? No, there is none! As long as you are alive, anything is possible (not excluding miracles). As long as you are alive, you are free to keep on trying. That is your choice. That is your call. As has been said, try and try again, until you succeed.
Always remember these two Latin maxims: Dum spiro, spero. As long as I breathe, I hope. And Dum vita est, spes est. While there is life, there is hope.
2. Struggles and pain may be inevitable but they offer opportunities for growth.
Life is not an “all-comfort zone”. Imperfect as life is, it is riddled with discomforts, disappointments and all kinds of dissonances. Pain and struggles are part and parcel of life, but they are not stumbling blocks; they help us grow. They are, in fact, a step forward towards learning and transformation.
Remember, the safest path is not always the most convenient or the best. The more the challenges, the more you learn, and the more opportunities for you to grow.
Sometimes we are so obsessed with what we want to get from our toils or exploits, such that we often forget that the best thing we can gain from every challenge and struggle is not the thing we want, but the “person’ we become in the process.
3. Worrying can’t change anything. Be positive and live in the present.
If there is anything that kills more people faster than any dreaded pestilence, it is worrying. You can’t change anything by worrying. Negative thoughts inevitably engender negative results. But positive thoughts create positive realities. You may not be capable of changing what is actually happening to you, but you can choose how to react from within to what is happening – by being positive.
You don’t have to cry over a failed or unhappy past, it’s gone. And neither should you stress yourself about the future, it hasn’t arrived yet. What you can do is live in the present and make it beautiful. The past can’t be altered, yes. But we can, at present, choose and act on what we desire for the future.
4. Loved ones or other people are enough reason for you not go give up. The bottom line is, be inspired even as you inspire others.
We did not come into this world alone, but through a family. And even outside our family circle, we are never alone as there are always people who are significant to us, or us to them.
In “bottom-stuck” moments, therefore, there is always a “significant other” – family, kin, or loved ones – who can be reason enough for you not to give up. They are your inspiration to persist and persevere.
Or, even other people, not related to you. They, too, could just as well strike a spark of inspiration deep within you, like those who are worse off than you are – or in a direr situation or environment than yours – and yet refuse to give up.
Yes, at rock bottom, by refusing to give up, you too can be a spring of inspiration to others. Someone else may just as well not give up because he or she has seen you refusing to give up.
5. Mistakes are OK, and scars are symbols of courage and strength.
The biggest mistake some people could ever make is to be too afraid to make one. But, come to think of it, mistakes are not completely mistakes; they, in fact, offer plenty of lessons.
According to a study conducted in Terminal Palliative Care wards, one of the regrets most people have when dying is their failure to take more risks than they should have had: “I wish I would have taken more risks,” the study noted. Sometimes, to be successful tomorrow, you must be wrong today. So don’t let the fear of making the wrong decision prevent you from making any decision at all. At the end of your fear is the “person” who you really want to be.
6. Your success or failure is not defined by others.
No matter how bad your situation is, do not mind what other people think about you. Opinions do not define reality, and judgments are a confession of character. Everyone has his or her own journey and struggles. Focus, instead, on your own greatness and strengths.
Compare yourself with others but in a positive, not negative, way. Negative is when we see only our supposed failures, inadequacies or frustrations over the success of others. Negative is when we fail to notice our own greatness and instead make others as our barometer of success.
Positive is when we acknowledge our uniqueness, greatness and individual potentials while respecting those of others; when being “here” or “there” in comparison with others is not a matter of success but a state of happiness in our relationship with others.
7. Always pray and have an “attitude of gratitude”.
Prayer can be the best antidote to any problem. But not only in “bottom-stuck” moments should we pray, but in both good and bad times, in all times.
According to Danish philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard, “the function of prayer is not only to influence God, but also to change the nature of the one who prays.” Prayer therefore is not only aimed at getting what we are praying for. By itself, it is a profound experience of transcendence or the divine, providing us a host of benefits: it calms the spirit and brings peace, joy, gratefulness and relief.
And, finally, it has been said that the highest form of prayer is giving thanks. So, always be grateful for what you have. Count your blessings.
Have peace, then. God is GREATER than your fears, worries, pains, struggles, anguish or despair, losses and tragedies – and, certainly, than COVID-19!