Community Whispers by Ray Junia
Community Whispers

A not so sacred, Sacred Cow!

Jun 1, 2021, 12:58 AM
Ray L. Junia

Ray L. Junia

Publisher

SO a park, planted to trees and reserved for better appreciation of Filipino life is going six feet under in favor a mega vaccine site. So what used to be green space in the metro will give way to structure to serve as vaccination site.

And we are supposed to be grateful to an “untouchable’ tycoon for the offer to build a mega vaccine site.

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While the government is intent to cut down trees to build a giant center for Covid-19 vaccination, the Catholic Church has offered their churches, spread all over the country and in highly accessible places to host vaccination efforts of the government.

All the government has got to do is ask. The priests are more than willing to open churches to help attain herd immunity and defeat the pesky virus.

And no need to cut trees.

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Richard had this problem with flatulence. After a meal, he would fart and he couldn’t control it.

Then his new girlfriend invited him to dinner with her family.

Uneasy it was at the beginning of dinner, then dread overcame him, feeling an incredible pain in the stomach and just had to fart.

Just then, the family dog was under the table and started to growl. His girlfriend’s mother yelled, “Fido”! The noisy dog serving as a cover, Ricky was relieved, he farted and thought the dog will be blamed.

Still believing the dog gives him cover, Richard let go a bigger fart and sure enough the father yelled, “Fido!”.

But still the pain in the stomach of Richard was too much, he again let out a huge, ripping fart.

Again, the mother shouted at the dog “Fido, get out from under the table before he shits all over you!”

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This untouchable tycoon is like this Richard in this farting story. He believes he has Fido under the table and can fool everybody with his fake generosity.

But of course, some people in the government don’t mind getting the shit all over them. Shit is color gold.

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Parks are favorite places for senior citizens.

I was chatting with my kapitbahay last week and we talked about parks and senior years. He feels sad the big city is losing places allotted for parks, giving way to roads and even casinos.

I told him not to worry. Casinos are favorite places of many seniors.

“Not me,” he said, adding he is too old for casinos. And he had a funny definition of old.

He said old is when your sweetie says “let’s go upstairs and make love” and you answer, “just pick one, I can’t do both.”

Or when your friend compliments you on your alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.

Or going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

Or an all-nighter means not getting up to use the bath room.

I was left guessing, which are facts and which are jokes?



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