By Amadeus Rex | Published: October 17, 2020
Life is rife with hardships and strife. But just as it isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, it isn’t all thunder and rain, either.
As the saying goes, after the rain comes the rainbow.
When you’re constantly faced with struggles and disappointments, however, it may be hard to accept any good thing that comes in the midst of it all. Such good things may appear to be either an illusion or short-lived, and seeing them that way may prevent you from taking any pleasure in them at all.
Things that are meant to make you feel good will start to feel more like mere drops of water after days of scorching heat, in that they are more spiteful than comforting. It seems likely that the hard times will return shortly.
When it feels as though you’ve been deprived of joy and pleasure for so long, you might not know what to do when something that would usually warrant it comes every once in a blue moon.
You might accept it for what it is, but when it’s gone, when all the pleasure you could possibly derive from it feels squeezed dry, or if it simply feels like nothing. What then?
When that end result you’ve so desperately strived for wasn’t exactly what you wanted, when the victory feels pyrrhic, how do you deal with it?
Accepting something you’re not used to may feel either like nothing or too much to handle.
You may be unaccustomed or too sensitive to it, as though it were a foreign concept.
Attempting to get used to it will take time and work, but you would first need to take it as it is rather than dismissing it as an outlier.
As a simple example: if someone shows you an unnervingly unfamiliar kindness, try to think the best of it rather than assuming they have ulterior motives, regardless of past evidence that people have done that, or that it would go wrong somehow.
Accept it as a good thing rather than a forecast of an oncoming trouble or misfortune.
While some things are too good to be true, you may be surprised at how true some of them might actually be.
You can keep your guard up to avoid allowing yourself to be completely vulnerable, but you should leave yourself open enough to not shut out potentially good things entering your life, even when the unpleasant has always been your regular experience.
One of the things I think of in regards to this sort of situation is the immediate crisis that remains before us.
The “new normal” is such a disheartening phrase, seeming to imply that all the things we have learned to do in this current day will be the way we must indefinitely live a long period of our lives.
The eventual day the crisis dies out, going back to what was previously considered “normal” will take its own period of time and work to get used to.
But the first thing to do to get used to it is to accept it.
When the crisis ends, society will inevitably readjust to the idea of a situation that no longer demands what was once invaluable.
It might be hard to deal with it after having spent so much effort adjusting to the “new normal”, but it’s the only way we will be able to recover from this current pandemic.
Accepting good things as good and real rather than assuming that they are false or ephemeral will be the necessary first step before deciding what to do with them.
By acknowledging their innate goodness and reality, any possible course of action that follows will be based on this idea that they are good, real, and must be treated as such.
We must accept that any and every such good thing coming to us is worthy of acceptance, regardless of whether or not we can immediately make sense of it, if at all.